Who Built the Table?

Making space at the table is a common analogy for inclusivity, and, honestly, one I never gave much thought. To me, it seemed obvious. Of course, everyone should be welcome to the discussion of important decisions. I took it for granted that it was a table of infinite size, and thought it was silly that anyone would be excluded. If I imagined any table at all, it was similar to the one described towards the end of CS Lewis's Voyage of the Dawn Treader, the incredibly long one loaded with a surplus of food for all.
 
The first time I gave any real consideration to the power dynamics of table space was while listening to an interview during the spicy times of Ferguson, MO, in 2014, after Michael Brown was shot. In it, the woman being interviewed pointed out that it’s one thing to get space at the table, but who built the table? Why won’t more white leaders accept invitations to black events and learn what’s already being done?
 
I feel naïve and ashamed to admit this, but it hadn’t even occurred to me that there could be more than one table. At the same time, it made perfect sense. Who built the table? It’s such a simple question. I started thinking about different stories and events I knew in the context of this reframing of the table metaphor. The person who “built the table” unquestionably has the balance of power in their favor. They get to set the rules and issue the invites. Tables have limited space and allow for exclusivity.

It also explains why a group with a powerful table would be resistant to accepting an invitation from another group. A real-life example of this also comes from Ferguson’s spicy times.
 
Michael Brown was shot in August, and the Grand Jury decision wasn’t made until the week of Thanksgiving. The entire space in between (and a while after) was full of tension. Understandably, folks were concerned about Halloween. It was proposed that the town sponsor a Trunk-or-Treat so the kids could have a safe and fun time. One respected Black Leader in the town reached out to the white Mayor and told him their community program had a well-established and well-attended Trunk-or-Treat and suggested they combine forces. The Mayor, who had a history of butting heads with this leader and was enjoying the attention of the national spotlight, declined. He chose instead to set up a separate town Trunk-or-Treat. I feel like it was at a competing time, but I can’t say that with confidence. However, I do know its attendees were predominantly white.
 
In other words, because the Mayor didn’t want to compromise and sit at another table for a minute, he missed the opportunity to help create a unifying event during a very divisive time.
 
My source? The wife of the Leader was one of my closest colleagues and a woman I respect immensely.
 
In conclusion, I’ve come to realize that’s why so many people in power ruin good things that don’t hurt them: they can’t stand other people having tables. If someone else has a table, then they have the ability to say I can’t join, and I can’t stand that.
 
Talk about insecurity.
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I’ve been thinking about colonization and other invasions through the lens of this metaphor. True, it’s an oversimplification. But it’s also true that a family happily eating unique foods at a large table would piss off a fully selfish and insecure rich kid.
 
What is fascism but destroying other people’s tables?
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via GIPHY